Starring: Amy Adams, Robin Dunne, Sarah Thompson, Keri Lynn Pratt
Sequel To: Cruel Intentions
Cruel Intentions 2 is equal parts teen sex comedy and regurgitation of scenes from the original. It’s fairly strange. They will recite exact pieces of dialogue from the original movie…then cap it off with a drunk girl vomiting on someone. Really. One of the better moments is when the leading male walks into the kitchen to see what’s for dinner and sees his personal chef in a blood-stained apron with a butcher knife in one hand and a live chicken in the other. I’m 100% serious.
It was originally planned as a television series to air on the FOX network, however was dropped because it was too obscene. Or terrible. Definitely one of those two. So they pieced together the episodes they’d shot with some new footage of nudity along with some vulgarity to spice it up for a video release.
The movie is a prequel to the original flick, which is odd as it’s specifically a part 2. It tells the story of Sebastian Velmont, the chief protagonist from the original, going from troubled kid who usually means well to the rich scumbag we meet in Cruel Intentions.
Sebastian, originally played by Ryan Phillippe, is played by Robin Dunne in this movie. Robin Dunne is someone we will be seeing a lot of on this site as he seems to have made quite a few sequels. I can’t wait for The Skulls II. His new stepsister Kathryn, originally played by Sarah Michele Gellar, is this time played by Amy Adams. You might know Amy Adams. In fact as far as I can tell she’s the first person to go from bad direct-to-video sequel to an Oscar nomination (for her awesome turn in The Fighter). Adams plays the character as equal parts Gellar’s portrayal in the first film and Tracy Flick (Reese Witherspoon’s character from the ridiculously good and very underrated movie Election). Rounding out the cast are Sarah Thompson (TV’s 7th Heaven and Angel) and Keri Lynn Pratt (She has a string of interesting credits including the Fat Albert movie and a turn as Cat Grant on Smallville).
The acting all around is pretty below average. The whole movie plays like a lower budget Lifetime movie. Except with teenagers, courser language, and some nudity. And of course some very odd humor choices. It’s as if they were trying to capitalize on fans of the original as well as fans of the American Pie series of movies. It’s hard enough to take a poorly written story seriously. It’s harder to take it seriously when the lead sees two naked twins and just stands there with his tongue hanging out making baby sounds and then falls on the ground. That’s the kind of humor they go for. Very out of place.
In all it’s not even the GOOD kind of bad. It’s just bad. Not fun to watch at all, really. And luckily I won’t have to again. But, you know…YOU should.
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